"What are you looking at?"Caught, Laura blushed but quickly recovered and shook her head. "I... guess I was just daydreaming," she said. "Maybe I've got spring fever or something. I was thinking of last year at this time, when I was in Paris."What an incredible fucking liar I am! she thought. She had never been to Paris. But somehow, she sensed that the very exotic nature of her excuse would divert April from the truth, that Laura was actually lusting after her very pretty young bottom."Paris? Really? Gosh, I bet it was great. Were you there with some guy?"Laura looked down, wondering how far this lie would take her. "Oh yes. He was my fiance. We were engaged, but he was in the Air Force, and they stationed him in Turkey. He fell in love with a Turkish girl."April got a tragic look on her pretty young face. "Oh god, Laura, I'm sorry! He threw you over for some peasant girl? Gosh, you look like a model! How could he do that?"Laura smiled wanly, trying to look tragic herself. "I try. "We wouldn't want the Unicorn Hummer to clash."Santa Claus frowned. "Clash, smash," he mumbled under his breath, but he consulted the list again. "No, it doesn't say," Santa grumbled. He adjusted his specs. He cleared his throat and read, "'Sandra Hochfeld, 123 Willow Way: Heavenly come.' Why on earth can't those elves get more info?" But then an impish grin spread across Santa's face. "Say, I've got an idea! I could pack both—silver and gold—then I could check out Sandra's hair color. Right there on the spot ... so to speak." Ho, ho, ho, I'll on-the-spot you," Mrs. Claus said, swatting her husband smartly on his sturdy backside. "We'll both go. That way no mistakes. No hanky-panky. Worse comes to worst, we give Sandra both Unicorns. A matched set. Six speeds divided by two, so to speak. Think of the combinations! Now that would really be a heavenly come!"And so it was that Santa and Mrs. Claus set off on their Christmas Eve rounds. And so it was that they arrived at the rooftop of.
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